Mother's Day 2012
by newgirl3366
Summary: A short story about Ted's birth. Keeping with the events as EL James wrote them. This is a short story I published in part 2. I am publishing it separately. I do not own Fifty Shades of Grey or any of the characters. All rights go to EL James.


_Mother's Day 2012_

_**My belly is round and**__ tight, resembling an over inflated basketball. Two more weeks, I tell myself as I stand before the open closet in our master bathroom at Escala trying desperately to do decide what I should wear to Mother's Day Brunch at The Grey's home in Bellevue. Anything remotely tight is torturous and I can't bear the thought of even an elastic waistband restricting my belly today, making pants no longer an option. During this past week the only thing I have been able to stand is a loose fitting dress. I decide on my teal maternity crossover maxi dress and pair it with my white knit shrug to keep my shoulders warm. Maxi dresses have become my new best friends. _

_After pulling my shrug on I slip my feet into my strappy sandals and then outwardly groan at the fact that I now have to buckle the straps on the sides. How in the heck am I going to manage this task? I elect to sit on the bottom of the bed and prop my feet on the small bench at the bottom. Now, can I reach my feet? I am leaning forward to give it my best try when I hear Christian come in the room._

"_Baby, what are you doing?" He asks, I hear a slight hint of amusement in his voice and while I know I must be a sight the irritation I have for not being to accomplish a simple task such as buckling my own shoes without becoming an acrobat is agitating._

"_What does it look like I'm doing?" I grunt and hoist myself forward. "I'm trying to buckle these damn shoes."_

"_Why not put on flats?"_

"_I. Want. These. Shoes. Christian." I am determined to wear the shoes that I want to wear._

_Without success he tries to hide his grin as he stifles a chuckle. "Let me help you." He offers and walks to sit beside me. "Give me your feet." _

_Blowing out a breath I concede, I cannot do this by myself, I need help. Slowly I turn my body so that I can place my feet on Christian's lap. "You look beautiful today Mommy." He says lifting my first foot ever so slightly and buckling the strap adorning my ankle. His fingers linger tracing the silver anklet I bought on our honeymoon. Goosebumps breakout on my arms and a shiver runs through my body. "But I think I have something to replace this ankle bracelet." _

_He brings a rectangular black velvet box in front of me. Where did that come from? "Christian," I beam. "You didn't have to buy me anything."_

"_Nonsense, you are carrying our son Ana. You will be showered with my love and gifts today." His free hand spreads wide, encompassing my immensely swollen belly. "You're eyes are smiling Anastasia, open it." _

_Slowly I open the box and gasp when I see its contents. An ankle bracelet made from alternating tiny white and black pearls, adorning it are two dainty charms made of white gold. One is the word 'mother' in an elegant script; the other is a little white gold boy. Instantly tears prick my eyes, thank you hormones. Smiling through my tears I turn my eyes up from the bracelet to see Christian watching me, love written across his lovely face. "It's beautiful Christian, perfect, I love it. Put it on me please." I say taking the bracelet from its box._

_With deft fingers he removes the one I am currently wearing and places it beside him on the bed then with care he encircles my ankle with the new one and fastens it. "Even on my fat ankle it looks gorgeous." I tell him. _

_He leans down and places a kiss on my ankle, "Nonsense, you are perfect and I love you."_

"_I love you so much Christian." _

_**Feeling the SUV come **__to a stop I lift my head from where it has been resting against the window and glance at the clock, it is just before ten and I am starving. Brunch was a wonderful idea but to this pregnant woman it was far too long to wait for my first meal of the day. I'm eating for two…I'm eating for two, this is my mantra. My mantra which I repeat to myself over and over again daily, Christian is thrilled to see me eating larger meals but then perhaps that's because he is not the one who feels as big as a whale. I reach for another one of my granola bars from the glove box and tear it open. This is the third one I've eaten today plus the two bananas I had before we left the apartment. This little man inside of me must have a huge appetite. How in the world am I going to keep him full once he arrives?_

"_Baby, I'm sure Mom has brunch all prepared and ready to be served." Christian says glancing over at me as he turns the ignition off._

"_I know but I'm hungry now. This baby of yours is always hungry." I say between bites and picking up the small piece of granola which falls onto my lap._

"_He's just a growing boy Mommy." He pats my belly before climbing out and walking around to my side._

_I am so glad we drove the SUV, watching me attempt to get out of the R8 has become quite the spectacle and riding in the back of any car is nearly impossible, making the fact that he gave Taylor and Sawyer the weekend off a good thing. Being chauffeured around by security while sitting in the backseat and fighting off nausea, not fun. It has been nearly nine months since the incident; slowly Christian is relinquishing some of the tight security he has had in place. For that I am glad, I am ready for life to resume as normal, whatever normal was before the attack. _

_ Grace meets us at the front door, opening it before we have a chance to knock or ring the doorbell. She envelopes me in her arms and hugs me gently before releasing me to touch my belly where her grandson seems to be sleeping. With the exception of a few kicks earlier this morning he has been quiet._

"_How are you feeling Ana?" She asks me._

"_Hungry," I smile. "I'm always hungry."_

"_Well brunch is ready to be served, shall we?"_

_Christian places his hand on the small of my back and we follow Grace into the house where we are met by Carrick, Mia, Ethan, Kate, Elliot, Grandpa Trevelyan and Grandma Trevelyan. Grandma immediately stands to greet me. She loves to touch my pregnant belly and is always so proud of the fact that one of her grandson's is going to be a father soon. She dotes over me, asking the same questions. How am I doing? Am I eating enough? Am I resting enough? And my recent favorite, are there any signs of labor? What is it with older people wanting to know all of your personal business? Once I have answered each of her questions she then rubs my protruding frame and exclaims, "Well you've certainly grown bigger since the last time I saw you. You'll be popping that baby out in no time Anastasia."_

_I wince at the idea of 'popping that baby out,' this is not something I want to hear two weeks from my due date. _

"_Mother!" Grace exclaims in an admonishing tone. "Most pregnant ladies do not like being told they are growing bigger."_

_Grandma Trevelyan looks at me with a chastened expression. "Oh, I'm sorry dear, I didn't mean anything by it. I just got carried away."_

_Taking her hand in mine I squeeze it gently, allowing both of our hands to rest on my belly. "It's okay. Teddy is growing every day." I smile and see her return my smile with one of her own. She and Grandpa where absolutely thrilled when we announced our baby's boys name would be Theodore Raymond Grey. Theodore after Grandpa Trevelyan and Raymond after Ray, our son will carry the names of his grandfathers and Christian and I could not be prouder. _

_I think Kate sees my discomfort from the conversation though and makes quick work to steal me away for a few moments. _

"_Ana, that reminds me I found the most adorable little outfit for my nephew and I just had to buy it, come see." She motions for me to follow her to the couch in the great room and I walk out of Christian's hold to join her. The others remain talking in the foyer and slowly migrate to the backyard where Gretchen is currently setting brunch out on the patio. _

_Kate presents me with a shopping bag, inside is a delicate blue romper adorned with tiny dark blue sail boats. "Oh Kate, it is precious. Thank you." _

"_You know I'll spoil him Ana." She grins. "I was going to wait until later to give it to you but you looked like you needed a little rescuing from Grandma Trevelyan."_

"_She means well Kate," I tell her and fold the romper up so that I can place it back in its bag. "It's just that I love being pregnant with Ted but I'm tired of being this huge. I mean look at me, I could barely fit through the door."_

"_You exaggerate Ana." She laughs. "You look wonderful; you've got that special glow of motherhood."_

"_It's called sweat Kate," I deadpan. "From the exertion it took me to get out of the car and into the house."_

_We both break into a fit of giggles. Kate will understand one day, I think to myself. It feels good to laugh with my friend though. We don't see each other enough, since graduating a year ago it has always felt like that. Like we both grew up and moved on to our own lives, her with Elliot, me with Christian and now I'm having a baby and she'll be married by the end of the summer. Sometimes I'm left wondering where the time has gone, it goes by so fast. _

"_Brunch is served," Gretchen announces from the double French doors and the remaining few of us inside turn to exit out to the patio. _

_Christian is by my side right away, helping me to waddle outside. Upon stepping outside I see the table is adorned with pink and white hydrangeas in tall glass vases. It is simply beautiful. _

"_Happy Mother's Day, Anastasia." Christian whispers in my ear. I feel his warm breath as he speaks and he plants a soft kiss right beneath my ear. I find myself leaning into him and closing my eyes. He nuzzles me kissing the same spot again before moving slightly. I open my eyes to see him holding a corsage in his hand, filled with blue and white roses. Blue roses! I have never seen blue roses before. _

"_Blue for our baby boy," he says by way of explanation and removing the white pearl tipped pin from the corsage he pins it to my dress, against my breast. Even in front of everyone his hand lingers a moment longer than necessary, subtly caressing my exposed skin. His eyes are locked on mine the entire time. I take his lips with mine in a tender kiss._

"_Our baby boy," I recite back to him against his lips._

"_This one has to be born before you can get started on the next one you two." Elliot pipes up inappropriately, as usual, and I see Grace flash her eyes over to him just as Kate elbows him in the stomach. _

"_Well at least I know how it's done Elliot. Would you like for me to buy you a beginner's manual of instructions for your wedding gift?" Christian retorts back at him._

"_That's enough out of you boys or I will send you both to your rooms." Grace places her hands on her hips while scolding her two sons. To their credit they retreat their sarcastic remarks, a wise choice on their parts because I know Grace is not just making idle threats. _

_ With the sun shining overhead and a warm breeze blowing we begin to serve each other in a family manner. Passing along the dishes and placing what we would like to eat on our plates. In true Christian style I am served, not being allowed to lift a finger, and as usual he serves me before serving himself. I gorge myself on potato basil frittata, maple-roasted bacon, a strawberry scone and a bowl of fresh fruit. I am sipping my tea when a happy little kick knocks against my belly. I gasp to myself and pat the place under my breasts where the little kick was felt._

"_Are you okay baby?" Christian places his silverware on the white linen clothed table and turns to me in concern. _

"_Teddy kicked, or punched, I'm not sure which." I answer him still holding my stomach. "It felt like a powerful one though. This boy is trying to turn me black and blue on the inside."_

_I pick my fork back up and take another bite of the frittata. Christian is still staring at me though as if he is waiting for me to do something miraculous like take flight or disappear into the ground below. "I'm fine Christian, really. It was just a kick." I take his hand with mine and squeeze it reassuringly. He looks at me skeptically but nods and returns to eating. The rest of the table is still in full chatter with everyone enjoying their meals. Grace however is watching me carefully. I smile at her and she raises an eyebrow, nodding in the direction of my belly. I mouth the words, "I'm fine," to her and she nods again._

_Honestly all of this fuss over one little kick. I finish eating, cleaning my plate and am finally full for the first time today. I recline back in my chair and rest my hands on my stomach, feeling satisfied and content not only from my delicious meal but because I am surrounded by family. Kate is busy talking about her wedding which will take place in four months while the men exchange the latest baseball scores, which teams are at the top and which are ones are struggling. Closing my eyes briefly I allow the sun to soak into my skin, warming me and relaxing me when I am suddenly prompted to open them. The shock of a tightening pain spreading across my abdomen surprises me and I move my hands down, holding my belly where the discomfort radiates from. It's not so much painful as it is tight, a sensation of pressure. It's just a cramp; I tell myself and try to disguise the fact that I am feeling anything. I do a poor job of it however, because the entire table stops talking at once, focusing solely on me. _

"_Oh my God Ana are you having contractions?" Mia blurts out._

"_No, Ted just kicked me again." I lie, please believe me, please believe me. This is too soon; I've got two or three more weeks to go. Dr. Greene told me last week that it should be a few more weeks. Should, is not a definitive term, my subconscious snarks at me, causing me to glare in her direction. Shut up, you are not the one having contractions during Mother's Day Brunch. _

_Their faces are unchanging though and everyone's attention is directed at me. "Perhaps you should lie down." Christian begins to stand and I grab his arm._

"_Christian I'm fine, please I'd like to stay and join everyone. I don't want to spend my day lying in bed while you all visit and enjoy each other's company." The discomfort passes as quickly as it came and my stomach muscles relax to normal. _

"_Anastasia,"_

"_Please," I beg again._

"_Okay but if it happens again," He warns._

"_I'll lie down." I finish and smile sweetly at him. He bends down to kiss me before scooting his chair closer to mine and placing his hand on my belly. He rubs it soothingly and I cannot deny how comforting his touch feels. Teddy gives a gentle kick. "He knows you're there Daddy." I laugh and Ted kicks again._

_ A few quiet minutes pass and I am relieved to have had no more contractions. That one was just a fluke, I tell myself. There's no reason to be alarmed. The sense of certainty does not last long though. I am in the middle of taking with Kate about her two cousins who will be her bridesmaids when my abdomen tightens again. With no lack of trying to avoid it my face grimaces._

"_That's it Anastasia, I can feel it. You are having contractions and we are going to the hospital right now." He stands abruptly and my eyes swing to Grace, pleading with her to stop her crazed son who is going to drag me by the hair of my head to the hospital should I refuse to go._

"_Christian…" She says and thankfully he stops long enough to acknowledge the fact that his mother is speaking to him. "Ana is still a few weeks away from her due date and first babies are often late. I believe these may be Braxton Hicks Contractions, false labor. We can time them but if they continue to be irregular, as they are now, there is nothing to be concerned about."_

_He looks down at me, obviously conflicted as to what he should do. "Dr. Greene told me I may have these Christian. I'll call her tomorrow I promise." I try to placate him. _

_Hesitantly he sits back down, "Ana, I…"_

"_I'm fine Christian, really."_

"_There I've marked the time on my phone," Kate pipes up. "Let me know if you have another Ana."_

"_Thank you Kate." I tell her._

"_Gretchen," Grace calls to miss bouncy pigtails who is standing nearby. "Please fetch two bottles of water for Mrs. Grey."_

"_Certainly ma'am," Gretchen answers and walks back in to the house. She reappears with two bottles of water instantly and hands them to me. I open one and take a long drink from it._

"_Stay hydrated Ana that will help to keep the Braxton Hicks at bay."_

_I down the entire bottle of water right away and start on the next one. By the time I am finished with it I need the bathroom and stand to go. Christian stands with me, "I just need the restroom." I whisper to him._

"_I'll go with you."_

"_Christian, honestly." I shake my head but smile up at him._

_ He is standing right outside of the door waiting on me when I open it. "You're okay?" He asks._

"_I'm fine." I feel like all I've done today is tell people I'm okay and that I feel fine. He takes my arm and we begin walking back out to the patio when I stop in my tracks, feeling another one coming on. I begin to breathe through it, taking air in through my nose and blowing it out through my mouth. He supports me and caresses my belly with his other hand, his touch comforting. "Let's walk okay?"_

"_Walk? Ana I think you should lie down."_

"_No, let's walk. I want to walk." I say standing back up from my bent over position. "It's been almost an hour since I had the first one. Grace is sure this isn't labor, it's okay."_

"_Alright Mrs. Grey, we will walk then."_

_We stroll back out the French doors and Christian tells everyone we are going for a walk. I let Kate know I had another episode but that it did not last long. Grace is certain I am experiencing false labor which comforts me; I trust her and her judgment. My feet are killing me though and I would like nothing more than to lose my sandals. "Christian, I want to feel the grass beneath my feet. Would you take my sandals off for me?"_

_He helps me to sit on a wrought iron bench near the end of the slate patio. Bending on his knee before me he takes one foot at a time in his hands and removes my sandals. I wriggle my toes in the cool, lush, green grass, this feels divine. My swollen feet do not like shoes at all and prefer freedom much more. _

"_In three days it will have been a year since I first laid eyes on you." Christian says cupping my expectant belly in both of his hands, still kneeling before me. _

_His declaration takes me by surprise, I wasn't sure if he'd remembered. "You remember the date we met?" I ask incredulously. _

"_I will never forget it Anastasia, it was the day my life was changed forever. The moment I saw your beautiful blue eyes looking up at me I knew I had to have you. Something changed in that one instant and I was never the same again." Leaning forward he presses his mouth to my belly, kissing our baby boy from the outside. I place one hand on my belly and the other I tangle in his locks; they are burnished copper, shining in the bright springtime sunshine. "You're sure you feel up to walking?" He asks shifting his eyes up to meet mine._

"_Positive."_

_He stands and holds his hand out to me. With as much grace as possible I stand beside him. He encompasses me with one arm, drawing me to him and we walk across the yard. Strolling at a leisurely pace, hearing the birds sing their songs around us, and taking in the scents of the wild roses growing near the trees we walk towards the water where the boathouse sits. Past the boathouse is a small dock. Feeling the roughhewn wooden planks beneath my feet I gaze at the cool waters below and the sound of the water lapping at the shore meets my ears. _

"_Could we sit here?" I ask._

"_Here?"_

"_Here, I'd like to dangle my feet in the water."_

"_The water is cold Ana."_

"_My feet are hot and swollen Christian, it will feel good." I smile at him and I know he cannot refuse me. With his help I gingerly sit down on the dock and he sits beside me. I touch one of my big toes to the water and it is icy but refreshing. I dip both feet in and sigh leaning back, supporting myself with my arms and turn my face up to the sky. "I wonder what he'll look like, our Ted." I muse out loud, mostly to myself._

_Christian moves so that he is sitting behind me and I move my arms to cradle my now quiet belly. My little mover must be napping. I prop myself up against Christian's chest, allowing myself to rest. He wraps his arms around me and places them protectively near where mine are located, holding his son and I both at the same time. "He'll look like his beautiful mother."_

"_Hmmmm…only if he has your eyes and your hair, we'll know soon enough though." I feel him tense slightly. "There's nothing to be scared of Christian. I'll be fine and our baby will be fine."_

"_I know, today just…"_

_I turn my head slightly so that I can gaze into his eyes. "Hey, it frightened me too. But we'll make it through this together and in the end we will have our beautiful baby in our arms."_

"_I'll never leave your side Anastasia." He whispers and kisses me tenderly, reverently, adoringly, and deeply. His tongue dances with mine, stroking it as he tastes me and I revel in the taste of him. I move my hand to caress his cheek and feel the familiar tickle of his soft stubble against my fingertips._

"_I love you so much Daddy."_

"_I love you more Mommy."_

_May 13, 2012 _

_Mother's Day Night_

_** I step out of**__ the shower and place my feet on the plush white bath rug while reaching for a towel. A hot shower is just what I needed to end this perfect mother's day. Despite the contractions I felt earlier in the afternoon my day was everything I could have hoped for. A beautiful gift from Christian, flowers, a delicious brunch and time with family. I truly feel so blessed to be a part of this huge loving family that I have married in to. I let my hair down from where I pulled it back to keep it from getting wet and hang my towel back up. A tiny kick lets me know my blip is still safely inside of my belly. I run my hand over the spot where I just felt him and smile. As much as I can't wait for him to be here and long to hold him in my arms I can't help but feel as if I'm about to lose something. I've carried him inside of my body for nine months and soon he'll be here. I know that is the way it happens and that is how it is supposed to be but up until this point he has always just been mine, once he is born I won't be the only one holding him anymore. _

_ Grazing my hands over my swollen belly I marvel at how much it has grown from the tiny little bump it was when I had to put on my first pair of maternity pants. And now he will be here any day, our lives will change forever with the first cry from our son, for the better. Our precious little one will be the light of his parent's lives. Startled by the sound of footsteps I look up to see Christian standing in the doorway. He is holding up the most beautiful nightdress I have ever seen. It is a baby doll nightdress with spaghetti straps and a sweetheart neckline. It is made of comfortable cotton fabric and is anything but simple. The background is white but it is adorned with bunches of tiny pink roses and wisps of green leaves. The bodice is trimmed with lace as is the bottom ruffle. _

_ He steps forward and begins slipping the straps from the hanger. "Your last gift Mrs. Grey." he says taking it in both hands and holding it above my head. I lift my arms and allow the soft fabric to slide over my head and down my body. I can't help but notice how my full breasts fill the bodice of the gown. As if reading my thoughts Christian grazes his hands over my breasts and cups them tenderly. My body clenches as the feeling of desire evolves deep down inside of me. Watching our reflection in the mirror is beautiful and erotic. "This gown, you can wear it now and after our son is born." He demonstrates the flexibility of the dress by unfastening one of the top corners from its strap. "It is a nursing gown as well."_

_My Fifty! The way he cares for me and our blip already, I love him so. "It's beautiful Christian, thank you." He refastens the strap to the gown and I turn in his arms, my belly protruding between us._

_Leaning down his pecks my lips softly, "To bed Mrs. Grey."_

"_Oh, I like the sound of that."_

"_To sleep." He corrects me sternly. I stick out my pouty lip in protest. "You had contractions today Anastasia, I'm not touching you."_

"_They weren't real contractions Christian, you heard your mother. Dr. Greene said it was perfectly fine to have sex until I went into labor and I am not in labor." See Grey? I can be just as firm as you can. He gives me a serious scowl and I giggle at him. "Besides, once blip is here you won't be able to touch me for six weeks." This should definitely emphasize my case. I want to make love with him now. He is still regarding me, torn obviously between what he wants to do and what he thinks he should do. In an attempt to help make up his mind for him I begin to trail my fingers down his black t-shirt until I find his belt buckle. "Pretty please," I say so sweetly and bite my bottom lip._

"_Anastasia…" He warns me but I refuse to heed him. _

_With one hand I release his buckle and unbutton his jeans. His eyes are hooded and his breathing is definitely accelerating, I know I am affecting him now. Ever so slowly I slide his zipper down and reach my hands inside of his boxer briefs, immediately finding my goal. He is hard and soft, ready for me and I want him now. I stroke my hand up and down his length, teasing the tip with my thumb, all the while watching him intently, and waiting for his decision._

"_If anything doesn't feel right,"_

"_I'll tell you. Please Christian, I need you so much." _

_He groans and wraps his hand in my hair, twisting it until it is tight at the nape of my neck. He pulls my head back and begins trailing kisses up my neck while I continue to allow my hand to explore him freely. "To the bed Anastasia." He growls. I release him from my hold just as he releases my hair and follow him to our bedroom._

_ Once we are in our bedroom he instructs me to lie down on the bed. "We're going to try something new Ana. I've read that it should be quite enjoyable for you and is also gentler." Hmmm…okay. I've enjoyed being on top, a lot! But I'm up for something else. _

_I lie down. "Scoot your bottom to the edge of the bed." I scoot down and hold myself up on my elbows, attempting to see over my protruding belly. I see the top of his head as he kneels between my legs. His hands grasp my ankles, parting my legs, and bending my knees slightly. "Are you ready Ana?" He whispers and ever so delicately touches my sex. I whimper at the sensitivity, I've been ready. _

"_Yes."_

_Slowly he inserts first one finger, testing me, then slides a second inside of me. They glide through my wetness effortlessly. Next I feel his tongue, tasting me before his lips plant soft kisses on the outside of me, traveling to my thighs, his fingers continuing to the move. "Do you want to come baby?"_

"_Please," I whimper. Ah! My body feels like a rope spun tense, needing to be released. Opening his pants and touching him, it made me want him even more than I did before. _

"_Please what?"_

"_Please, sir." He flicks his fingers madly and I erupt instantaneously, exploding into a million pieces. He doesn't linger there for long before he begins inching my gown up, exposing my belly. His lips move up and over my tight skin, kissing me tenderly. Upon reaching my breasts he unfastens each of the straps and allows the bodice to fall, revealing me to him. _

"_Sweet Jesus, you are gorgeous." He breathes and in this moment I feel gorgeous. Most days I have felt like a huge unattractive oaf but right now in this bed with the man I love, making love to me, I feel as if I am the most beautiful woman on earth. Christian has loved my swollen belly from the moment I began to show. Holding his hand over me protectively, caressing my stomach as it grew. He has cherished each new step of my pregnancy more than the last. And I revel in it, watching him adore the new life we created together as it has grown inside of me. _

_He traces my face with his fingers and kisses me gently while arching his body so that he forms around mine. "Are you ready Ana?"_

"_Yes, please, let me feel you."_

_I watch him stand before me at the edge of the bed. He lifts each of my legs and I think he is going to place them on his shoulders, yes we've done this before, but first before doing that he crosses them as if they were scissors. Resting my left foot on his right shoulder and my right foot on his left shoulder, slowly and deliciously he enters me, sliding in at a steady pace so that I can feel each delectable inch of him. _

"_Is this okay?" He asks._

"_Oh God, yes Christian. This feels so good."_

_He pulls back out and slides in again, still maintaining his even pace. I keep my eyes lock on his and revel in the feeling of my husband making love to me. I loose myself in the feeling of him until my body begins to clench around his and I come apart at the seams._

"_Ana!" He cries out and spills himself inside of me. Each second of this is better than the one before, he is so deep inside of my body and my soul. _

_**Monday, May 25, 2012**_

_ This is my last day of work until after Ted is born. When will I return back to work? I know nothing would make Christian happier than for me to quit working all together but I'm not sure I would ever want to do that. I love my job and I feel so proud of my accomplishments but I am ready for my baby to be born. After a week of enduring unpredictable Braxton Hick's I find myself even wearier than I was when I experienced the first ones on Mother's Day. They are becoming more frequent and I have today to wrap things up at work, blip will be here soon. Christian didn't want me come to work today but I convinced him that I would only stay until lunch time. He will be here to pick me up at noon, ensuring that I stick to my word. _

_ I've been sitting at my desk sending out last minute correspondences for just over an hour when I feel an intense pinching pain in my lower back. I reach around to rub the site of the pain. Oh! That does not feel good. The discomfort passes finally and I continue on with my work. One more week until my due date, I was barely two centimeters at my appointment Friday and everyone keeps telling me first babies are often late. Thankfully I have one more week to finish prepping for Teddy's arrival. I still need to wash the last few of his clothes, pack our bags and organize a few items in the nursery. Just enough time is left to take care of my last minute preparations. Hitting send on an email to Roach I reach down in my bag beside my desk for my apple Mrs. Jones packed this morning. She packed me enough fruit for a fruit salad; she's always making sure 'the mommy to be' has enough to eat. She takes such good care of me. Sitting back up straight a strong contraction squeezes across my belly. Damn! This almost hurts. I grip the edge of my desk and find myself actually trying to breathe through this one. This cannot be good. _

_ Hannah chooses this moment to walk through my open door. "Ana!" She shouts and rushes to my side. _

"_Hannah…I think I'm having a contraction." I manage to get out. _

"_Do you want me to call Mr. Grey? Of course I should call Mr. Grey. I'm getting right on it, I'm calling Mr. Grey." She begins babbling incoherently and I love her but God it is making me crazy. She has got to stop this! _

"_Hannah! No, please I'll call him. Just take my calls and tell Claire I'll be leaving early."_

_With the contraction passing behind me I begin to feel better. It was just another false alarm, I tell myself, but even I'm beginning to doubt the truth behind that statement. I look at the time on my computer and it is 10:12am. Quickly I grab a piece of notepad paper and a pen. I jot down the time of the contraction, I need to track these things before I decide whether this is the real deal or not. What the hell am I saying? I sound like a fast food commercial. Focus Grey, you could be going into labor. What was I doing? Call your husband! My subconscious shouts at me. Yes, call Christian, that's what I need to do. He is going to freak out. I wouldn't be surprised if he tries to call 911 and send an ambulance to take me to the hospital. My subconscious smirks and nods in agreement; boy does she know my Fifty._

"_Yes, Mrs. Grey. Don't worry I've got it. I'll be right back." She rushes out the door and down the hall. I love that girl so much but she is a bit...bubbly? Is that the right word for it? _

_I look down at my round belly and laugh, "She's the reason you're here blip." I smile, I've told my blip this since I first found out about him being in my tummy. Steeling for myself to handle the insanity which I know is about to ensue I pick up my cell phone and dial Christian._

_He picks up on the first ring, well actually the first half ring. "Ana?" His voice is laced with panic at the unexpected hour of my phone call. He has been on pins and needles due to my intermittent false contractions. _

"_Yes, it's me. Christian I need you to come pick me up early."_

"_What? Why? Are you okay?" Chill out will you? I think in my head. I would never say that out loud to him. I know he's just an anxious father-to-be. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't become anxious over the past few weeks. Feeling these Braxton Hick's contractions has really put reality in the forefront. I'm going to be giving birth soon and to be honest, I'm scared. I would never tell him that though, I don't need to add my worry to his. _

"_I'm okay, I've just had an uncomfortable contraction and I want to go home and lay down." I tell him trying to mollify him and myself. Inside I'm secretly freaking out. _

"_Do you need to go to the hospital?"_

"_No, I'm timing them Christian, I haven't had another one and I just want to go home."_

_I hear him cover the phone with his hand and his muffled voice speaks crassly to someone who is asking him a question. I don't know who was just on the receiving end of his wrath but I immediately feel sorry for them. _

"_I'm sorry baby; I'm on my way right now. Don't go anywhere." He hangs up abruptly and I am left rolling my eyes at the phone. Where would I go Christian? I swear sometimes that man…_

_ I decide to type out a schedule for the conferences Hannah will sit in on with Roach and five new authors over the next month and email it to them both. I finish my apple and throw the core in the trash can near the door, perfect shot Ana and I smile to myself. Ten minutes and not another hint of a contraction, I'm beginning to second guess my decision to call Christian when my abdomen tightens again. Not another one. I grip my desk again to ride it out and find myself breathing through it just like before. Is this it? Please little blip just give mommy some more time. I rub my belly and am blowing out a breath when my door flings open._

"_Ana!" Christian screams my name as if I were sitting her bleeding to death and rushes to my side. Hannah runs in directly behind him. "Call the hospital Hannah, tell them we are on our way." _

"_Christian, no." I breathe out._

"_Hell Anastasia, do you want to have the baby here? We are going to the hospital now!" I know you are scared Christian and so am I but please calm down; I need you to be calm for me. _

"_Christian you may go to the hospital but I am not." I put the emphasis on I. "Dr. Greene told me to time them and call her if they are less than five minutes apart. I have only had two and they were more than ten minutes apart. It's not time yet. Now please, take me home." My cool and controlled tone of voice must work because he concedes and begins gathering my bags. With my briefcase and purse in one hand he helps me to stand from my chair with his other hand. I am grateful for the support of his arm around my lower back, which is still nagged by a persistent ache. _

_Claire and Hannah send me out the door with smiles and well wishes. They both know I won't be back at work until I have a baby in my arms. Taylor is waiting at the curb with the SUV idling. Upon seeing us he jumps out and opens the backdoor for me. _

"_Mr. Grey, allow me to take Mrs. Grey's bags." He says hurriedly, taking my things from Christian's hand. Don't tell me Taylor is freaking out too! "Where to sir, the hospital?" He asks after placing my bags in the passenger seat. _

"_No, to Escala Taylor." The disdain for my decision about not going to the hospital is evident in Christian's tone of voice. He closes my door and moves around to the other side, opening his door and sliding in beside me. Taylor gives me a grim look of disagreement from the rearview mirror before flipping on his turn signal and pulling out into traffic. _

_**Christian helps me from**__ the vehicle and keeps me close as we ride the elevator up to our apartment. Despite the fact that I have not had another contraction he is still on pins and needles. Every facial expression I make warrants him asking me if I am okay or if I am having another pain. Gail is busy making lunch when we enter the apartment. It smells heavenly and I suddenly realize just how hungry I am. Christian sets my bags down in the foyer and leads me through great room and past the kitchen stopping only long enough to speak to Gail._

"_Please bring Mrs. Grey's lunch to our room." _

"_Very well, Mr. Grey." Gail agrees with him before I have a chance to object. She reaches under the counter and produces a wooden tray which she begins setting with a napkin and silverware._

"_I can eat here in the kitchen."_

"_No, you can eat lying down."_

_I purse my lips in frustration but choose to say nothing, Gail smiles and winks at me. All I can do is sigh and relinquish the thought of eating my lunch anywhere but in my bedroom. A nap doesn't sound like a bad idea though. _

_ After enjoying a delicious lunch I pull the covers over my pregnant belly and nestle a pillow between my legs, offering some support to blip as I lay on my side. Sleeping in a comfortable position has been nearly impossible but I have found having a pillow to brace my belly against helps somewhat. I yawn and feel my eyelids becoming heavier when I hear the sound of Christian's voice growing louder as he approaches the bedroom, he must be on the phone. He ends the call before walking through the door. I watch him stop and observe me warily. He cannot hide the worry etched across his lovely face. His brow is furrowed thoughtfully and I know he is waging internal turmoil against himself. He wants me to go to the hospital because he is worried. There is nothing to worry about though, I am fine and blip is fine. Choosing to say nothing he slips his shoes off and climbs in bed beside me. He turns on his side and wraps his arms around my belly from behind. Slowly I feel him lift my nightdress up, the same nightdress he gave me a week ago, and slide the sheet down until nothing is between my skin and his. His hands embrace my bare belly, sending shivers from their warmth up my spine. Blip answers his father's touch with a small kick._

"_He feels you Daddy, he says 'hi'." I grin; our baby has recognized his father's touch for so long now. I cannot help but wonder if it will be the same when he is finally held in his daddy's arms. _

"_I called my mom. She doesn't think it will be long now because you are having back pain. Do you want to call your mother?"_

"_I will when I wake up from my nap. She will be here this weekend anyway. I think blip will wait until then." I don't feel the conviction of my words, I want to meet my baby boy so badly but now I feel apprehensive. I wish I could shake this feeling of butterflies in my stomach. Deep down I know Grace is right, blip is coming sooner rather than later. And for the first time I realize I am scared, terrified. For so long I've put off thoughts of giving birth, it just seemed like a distant moment which would never get here but now it is here and I am petrified. I've taken all of the classes, read the books, gone to every doctor's appointment but am I ready for this? Can I do this? I feel my heart rate beginning to increase and my breaths become short. Calm down Ana, you have to calm down; panicking is not good for you or the baby. _

_Christian feels the tension in my body and begins rubbing my belly. "Ana, what is it? Is it the baby?"_

"_No, he's fine." I struggle to get the words out around the tears which are now threatening to fall. Pull it together! I shout to myself in my head. But I can't, my thoughts are swirling now like a cyclone in my mind and I have to get them out or I feel like I will explode from fear. "Christian, I'm scared." My voice is barely a whisper. _

"_Baby…" He pulls me tighter to him. _

"_I don't think I can do this. I don't think I can handle it, giving birth to our son. Oh God Christian, what if I can't do this?" My body is shaking from fright and I feel tears streaming down my cheeks. This sudden wash of emotion is more than I can handle. I've been so sure of myself until now, what a time to get stage fright. Feeling absolutely ridiculous I cover my face with my hands, trying to hide my tears. _

_Christian moves so that he is lying in front of me and gently pries my hands away from where I am hiding myself. "Hey," he whispers before kissing each of my eyes, each of my cheeks and finally my lips. "Your lips are so soft when you cry," he says before kissing me again. Cupping my face in his hands he continues to kiss me, trying to convey something to me through his touch. His love, his adoration, his belief in my strength, are these the things he is trying to tell me? He always tells me how strong I am but right now I can't seem to find that strength within myself. "I'm right here Ana, I'm not going anywhere. Please baby, don't be frightened."_

_His words only make me sob harder. I want so much to be brave for him but I don't feel the courage of my convictions right now. I only want to wrap my body around Christian and lose myself. Forget the unknown I am facing and feel my husband's love for me. _

"_I need to feel you Christian." I murmur against his lips, between kisses. He pulls back and stares deep into my eyes. Silently I plead with him, I want him so much. This is the way we communicate with each other and I need to find my strength in our love. Closing his eyes he kisses me again, deeper this time and I know he is saying yes. With his lips on mine I quickly unbutton his white dress shirt and slide it off his shoulders, feeling his muscles ripple against my palms. He groans and my hands find his hair, tangling in his locks. Slowly he moves his body so that he is lying down. I watch him undo his belt and his pants, sliding them, along with his boxers down his legs and finally kicking them off to the foot of the bed. _

"_Come here sweet girl." He says holding his hands out for me. Carefully I move myself so that I am kneeling beside him. "Take my hands to support yourself." I comply and he helps to hold me up until I am straddling his hips. "Easy baby, take it slow." With one hand covering my belly and the other grasping my hip he guides me until I am sliding down and over him. I gasp at the full feeling of him inside of me. My body is receptive and sensitive to his touch. Closing my eyes I bite my bottom lip, absorbing all of the sensations at once. "Is it too much Ana?"_

"_No," I whimper. "I want you. Please."_

"_Move how you want Ana, only do what feels comfortable to you."_

_He cradles my belly in both of his hands now, running his hands freely over my expectant swell. "So beautiful…take my hands to support yourself." He takes my hands in his and I begin to move. Up and down, gliding back and forth, feeling every amazing inch of him as he fills me completely. This is healing and I need it so much. His body, his words, his belief in me, they all heal me. Being with him like this, I feel so alive and somehow I begin to find myself and the courage I need to bring our first child into the world. _

_ Sated by our lovemaking we both fall into a restful sleep, enveloped in each other's arms. For now blip is quiet and I am relaxed. My earlier anxiety is forgotten, replaced by bravery. Soon I will give birth to our son and Christian will be by my side through it all. He will always be with me and we can do anything as long as we are together. _

_**I choose to have**__ my dinner at the dining room table, feeling a good bit better than I did earlier this morning. The nagging dull ache in my lower back is still prevalent but I decide not to worry Christian with such a trivial complaint. We enjoy Gail's finest pasta with Bolognese sauce. This is absolutely one of my favorite dishes she makes and I find myself scooping up the remaining sauce from my plate with a slice of baguette. I am licking my fingers when Christian chuckles at me, remarking about how hungry I must have been. I give him a smirk and take my last bite of bread before tasting the last bit of sauce from my pointer finger. _

"_I'm still eating for two Mr. Grey." I remind him._

_He drinks down the remainder of his red wine before scooting his chair back and placing his napkin on his empty plate. "Yes you are, and it is time for the two of you to get back to bed."_

_I raise my eyebrows at him suggestively but he shakes his head 'no', "to rest." He corrects me as he pulls my chair out and helps me to stand. When I stand a sharp pain shoots through my groin causing me to gasp and nearly double over. "What is it Ana?"_

"_Mmmmmm…" I make a sound somewhere between a moan and a grunt. "Nothing, I think it was a kick or something, I'm not sure."_

"_Was it a contraction?"_

"_No, I don't think so." There is a lingering throb where the pain was located. "I think I'd like to have a shower."_

"_Come on baby, I'll start one for you." Supporting me with one arm around my waist and the other holding my hands he walks me to our bedroom and into our palatial bathroom. "Sit down and I will run your shower." He says indicating towards the vanity chair. _

"_Christian I can stand and take off my clothes." He gives me a disapproving glare but says nothing. _

_ The warm water feels good against my skin, soothing away the cramps forming in my lower abdomen. I doubt I'll get much sleep tonight. While these are not full blown contractions I can't help but know that something is different this time. What I'm feeling is odd, more intense and painful. Before the Braxton Hicks were merely uncomfortable, never painful, these twinges I am feeling now are painful. Between washing my body and lathering my hair I notice Christian moving around the bathroom as if he is gathering items. What is he doing? He's packing your hospital bag, my subconscious tells me blatantly, because you are having the baby. I choose to ignore her, ignorance is bliss. It won't keep the inevitable from happening though, she reminds me. Letting the water wash over my head, rinsing the soap bubbles to my feet I tell her where she can take her harpy attitude. Once I am finished rinsing I turn the knobs, ceasing the flow of water from our gigantic shower head. I open the glass door and reach for a towel when something happens which stops me in my tracks. I feel the slightest trickle of fluid running down my leg and I know instantly that it is not water from my shower._

_Christian is standing at the sink placing my toothbrush in a duffle bag when he sees me. He looks to my face then down to the floor where a small puddle of liquid is forming. "Is it time Ana? Is he coming now?" His voice is surprisingly calm, laced with a mixture of wonder and confusion. _

"_I think…I think my water just broke. I think it's time Christian." I am still standing in the same spot, a larger puddle at my feet than before, partly from my body and partly from the fact that I am dripping from my shower. Oh God, it's time, blip is coming. Excitement courses through my veins, leaving no room for the fear which was there earlier. My baby is coming, we will finally be able to hold our son in our arms and kiss him for the first time._

_He shakes his head as if to break a spell and bring him back to the here and now. "Let's get you dried off and dressed." He grabs my nightdress from where I discarded it on the counter shoving it in my direction. I do not want to show up at the hospital in my night clothes. _

"_Please Christian, let me dress in at least one of my wrap dresses." I beg, trying to dry myself off quickly when another contraction starts. I drop the towel to the floor and hold my tightening belly, smiling through the soreness, just hold on blip, let mommy get to the hospital first. _

"_Anastasia, we don't have time!"_

"_He is not coming right now Christian, this could take hours." The twinge of pain passes and I stand full upright, determined to dress._

_ Christian helps me dress as if I were a small child then instructs me to sit on the bed while he finishes packing up mine and blips bags. Earlier I thought he was silly for starting to pack; now I'm grateful he did. He sets the bags on the floor beside my feet and reaches in his pocket for his cellphone. He presses a few buttons before placing he phone to his ear and barking out orders to Taylor, telling him to bring the SUV to the front of the building because we are going to the hospital. The phone call takes mere seconds. I imagine Taylor acting as cool and collected as ever but internally freaking out as much as Christian is on the inside and outside. He hits end before dialing the phone again._

"_Mom!" He calls out in panic when Grace answers the phone. "We are going to the hospital, Ana's water just broke. Yes, yes, no, we need to get going….Okay fine, make it quick."_

_He impatiently hands the phone to me and I put it to my ear. "Hello?"_

"_Ana, Christian says your water broke?" Despite Christian's maniac conversation Grace is calm, it takes a lot to ruffle her. _

"_It did, just a few minutes ago."_

"_Are you having contractions?"_

"_I've had a few, but I'm fine."_

"_And Christian, is he okay?" I stifle my laugh and choose not to tell her that he's freaking out although I'm sure she already knows._

"_Yes."_

"_He's just worried Ana, but all three of you will be fine." I smile, Grace has a comforting manner, she can soothe any storm to a simple rain shower. "We'll meet you at the hospital."_

_We say our goodbyes and I hand Christian back his phone. He places it back in his pocket and hurries me out the door. Taylor is waiting at the curb as ordered with the SUV running. _

_ On the way to the hospital we call my mom, Ray and Dr. Greene. Fortunately she is already at the hospital with another delivering patient and will be waiting for us at the reception desk. Mom starts crying when I tell her we are going to the hospital to have Ted, Ray hangs up immediately and says he is on his way. I beg him to be careful on his trip and he promises to be, I swear I can hear him choking back tears when he tells me goodbye. Oh Daddy, I love you so much. Christian squeezes my hand and, I move my eyes to gaze into his._

"_Ray's on his way?"_

_I nod my head, "Mom says she is coming but Bob has to stay for work." Mom wanted to book a flight but Christian of course insisted that he would send his plane. Thankfully Mom conceded without any argument, making it easier on me. The last thing I want to deal with right now is strife between anyone. I hope Ray and Mom make it in time for Ted's birth. I know Christian's family will be here but I hadn't realized until this very moment how important it is to me to have my parents here too. Please wait for your Grammy and Gramps to be here little blip, they are so anxious to meet you too. I silently plead with my baby while rubbing my expectant belly. By this time tomorrow he will be in my arms, it seems so surreal._

"_What are you thinking Ana?" Christian asks, squeezing my hand in his again._

"_I'm hoping that Mom and Ray make it here before blip does."_

_He unbuckles his seatbelt and slides over to the middle, covering my belly with his other hand. "They will baby, they will." _

_Looking up into his anxious gray eyes I see his love for me. I lean my head to rest on his shoulder, if I could just hold onto this moment for a little longer, I think. Everything is about to change, the minute that we pull into the hospital parking lot things will move faster than they are right now. I savor this tranquil moment, wishing it could last. _

_**True to my prediction**__ the next hour is a blur of activities. Dr. Greene checks us in and the hospital staff usher us back. Thankfully we have filled out most of the paper work ahead of time so I am taken to an examining room where I am poked, prodded, dressed in a stylish green hospital gown and hooked up to an iv before moved to my own room in labor and delivery. We saw Grace and Carrick upon entering the lobby but I haven't seen them since. Christian has not left my side once though, his voice has been a lulling calm for me to cling to while I listen to the nurses spouting off medical jargon and filling out charts. Finally Dr. Greene tells me that my water has indeed broken and my contractions appear to be steady and strong. I am progressing at a good rate and blip is doing fine. Before leaving she allows us to hear blips heart beat and see him on the ultrasound machine she has wheeled in just to ensure that he everything looks as it should. We are both watch and listen silently, processing the fact that he will be here with us soon. Lastly she asks if I would like an epidural when I am able to have one. This has been a point of contingency between Christian and me. Not wanting to see me in pain he has insisted I take one, I on the other hand do not want one, I tell her I will let her know and she reminds me that there is a point where I can no longer have one, she also ensures me that my birth plan is on file and that she will be back to check in on me. _

_ Once Dr. Greene is gone we hear a soft knock on the door. "Come in," I call and the door opens revealing Grace, Mia and Kate._

"_I hope you don't mind I brought these ladies with me." Grace grins._

_I beam, happy to see Mia and my best friend. "I don't mind at all." _

"_How are you feeling Ana?" Mia asks as they all come to stand beside my bed. Christian is sitting in the chair on the other side which he has pulled right up to my bedside. He is holding my hand in his and while he may not admit it I can feel it shaking ever so slightly. I rub my thumb over his, reassuring him that I am fine. He presses his lips to my temple and I briefly close my eyes before reopening them to focus on my visitors._

"_Okay, Dr. Greene says everything looks good and now we just wait."_

"_If you feel up to walking dear, it might hurry things along. First babies can be stubborn though; he's all snug and warm inside of his mommy and may not be eager to come out." I smile at Grace, I love her. "Are your Mom and Ray on their way?"_

_I tell her about calling them on the way here and how excited they both were and how I hope blip waits for them to arrive before he does. "I'm sure they'll make it in time." She assures me. "Well, we'll go sit in the waiting area and allow you two to get settled. Remember walk, and get some rest if you can. My little Grandson will be keeping you awake soon enough." She pats my other hand and I tell her I will walk and promise to rest. Kate and Mia each bid me goodbye. I encourage them both to go home and sleep for the night, promising them each a phone call when things begin to progress. Reluctantly they both agree to leave on those terms._

_ I love each and every member of our family but I am grateful for time alone, just the two of us before Teddy is born. The clock on the wall reads ten o'clock and I know we are in for a long night. Any signs of the contractions I was having before arriving at the hospital have slowly subsided. Leaving me with dull cramps which are not intolerable my any measure, I keep thinking this should be happening faster, but if Dr. Greene is not worried then I should not be either. _

"_Do you want to walk Ana?" Christian asks from beside me. _

_I decide moving is a good thing so with his help I stand from my bed and holding the iv stand with one hand and his with the other we begin wearing a path up and down the maternity wards long hallways. He walks patiently with me, there is a meditative silence between us, both engrossed in our own thoughts. It is comforting though, and I find myself leaning on him the longer we walk, my day finally catching up with me. _

_ After an hour of walking I am beginning to feel tired, my belly is heavy to carry and my contractions have not strengthened by much. Begrudgingly I give in to Christian's requests that I go lie down. I want so badly to hurry this along but my body feels worn. I am not back in bed long before a nurse who tells us her name is Karen comes in to check my vitals and monitor how blip is doing. Apparently everything is still moving along fine, she writes down something on the clipboard at the foot of my bed and leaves us. _

_ Worry lines giving away Christian's unease mar his face, creasing at the corners of his eyes. _

"_Hey," I whisper to him, pulling him from his contemplative state. "I'm fine, the baby's fine." _

_He nods and kisses my lips. "I know."_

"_But you're worried." I watch him look away I can see him struggling with himself internally. "Tell me…"_

_He sighs deeply before speaking. "I can't control this Ana, what is happening to you is beyond my control and I feel so helpless, unable to do anything for you."_

_My Fifty, he needs control and this situation is out of his hands, I get it and I know he is scared. I lift my free hand and run my fingers along his strong jawline. The hospital room is quiet with the exception of the monitor the nurse hooked back up to watch my contractions, allowing me to hear the fear in his voice. "You are doing everything for me Christian, being here with me, holding my hand. It's all I need right now."_

_He gazes upon me with tired eyes, drained of all color, faded shades of gray left behind. _

"_Come and lie with me. Hold me please." I whisper to him. He does not hesitate to kick off his shoes and climb in my hospital bed, pulling me close and laying one hand over my belly and resting the other around the top of my head. And just like the last time we shared a hospital bed we both drift off into a tranquil sleep. "I love you Christian." I tell him as my eyes begin to close. I can tell by his breathing that he is already dreaming deeply but I know his heart is hearing my words. _

_**Three quick knocks on**__ my hospital room door rouse me from my sleep, reminding me where I am and what is happening. Blip, I'm getting ready to meet my little blip. The light above my bed is the only one illuminating the room and Christian is still asleep beside me, I shake his arm gently causing him to stir._

"_Christian, wake up." _

_He blinks rapidly taking in his surroundings. "What is it Ana? Are you okay?"_

"_I'm fine, there's someone at the door though." _

_He moves from where he is laying, standing beside my bed, and I call for whoever is at the door to come in. Nurse Karen enters, flipping on the lights, and greets us both with her smiling face. She is middle aged with short blonde hair, dark eyes, a kind face, a soft voice and a gentle demeanor. "How are you feeling Mrs. Grey?" She asks as she sets about to complete whatever tasks are necessary. _

"_Good, I've been sleeping. I walked for an hour before."_

_She smiles at me and nods before placing the blood pressure cuff around my arm. After taking my temperature and checking the monitor she reaches for the clipboard at the end of my bed again. "How are your contractions?"_

"_They're just mild cramps, nothing too uncomfortable." I was able to sleep through them without any medication so they can't be bad at all. I look over at the clock and notice that it is just after midnight, meaning I've been here for a little over two hours. Somehow I feel like this is going to take forever. _

"_That's good." She finishes jotting a few things down and tells me to call her if I need her otherwise she will be back to check on me in a few hours. I thank her and turn my attention back to Christian. _

"_Do you want to sleep more baby?" He asks rubbing small circles on my hand. I yawn and nod my head. He climbs back in bed with me and before long I am wrapped in his arms, sleeping again._

_ A sharp pain shooting through my abdomen wakes me and I grip Christian's arm tightly. My eyes are now wide open, all thoughts of sleep forgotten. Abruptly he sits up, shaken by the way I awoke him. _

"_Ana?"_

"_Christian…again…" I breathe out and in, trying to handle the tension across my belly. _

"_Breathe Ana, I'm here, I'm here." His voice is calm even though I know he is anything but. I ride out the pain until it is gone before looking up into his face. _

"_What time is it?"_

_He looks over to the clock on the wall, "Just before two baby, do you want me to call the nurse?"_

"_No, it's passed." I lean my head against his chest, allowing him to hold me upright. I cup my belly and he places his hand over mine. _

"_Do you think he's finally coming?"_

"_I hope so; he seems to be taking his own time doesn't he?" I laugh trying to add levity to the situation. Christian kisses my temple and holds me head to his shoulder with his free hand. My fingers trace a line up and down the front of his black t-shirt, both of us depending on touch to soothe, appeasing our anxiety and fears. We sit like this until I feel another contraction start. He holds me, encouraging me to squeeze his hand and breathe with him. These weren't that far apart, it couldn't have been more than two minutes at the most. "I want to move Christian, I need to walk." My body is becoming restless, staying in this position and continuing to endure the painful discomfort is no longer an option. I want to move. _

_ We begin our regimen of walking slowly up and down the hall again. Stopping when I feel a contraction coming on to hold each other and breathe together before moving again. We are making our tenth lap around the nurses' station when I hear my name begin called. I recognize the voice immediately, Daddy. I turn to see Ray moving at a hurried pace in my direction. When he reaches me I throw my arms around him, stepping away from Christian momentarily, he holds my iv stand while Ray holds me._

"_Hey there Annie, how are you holding up?"_

"_Fine Daddy, better now that you're here." I try to hold back my tears, I'm so happy to have Ray here with me. It's almost as if I've been holding my breath waiting for him to arrive, not wanting him to miss the birth of his grandson. He releases me and I hold my iv stand while he reaches out to shake Christian's hand. They greet one another, exchanging short pleasantries. Christian is not full of chatter and small talk; he's too distracted to be much beyond cordial. Ray tells us he is going to visit with Grace and Carrick in the waiting area and will be back to check on me. Now I'm just waiting for my mother to come. Only a little bit longer my blip, Grammy will be here soon. _

_**The morning sun is**__ beginning to dawn, casting an orange hue through my hospital room. We have not slept since the contractions began to strengthen around two, I doze in between pains, they are consistent coming every five minutes or so and exhaustion is setting in. Dr. Greene checks me and I have dilated to five centimeters. In eight hours I have only made three centimeters of progress. This entire process is becoming discouraging. My body is working so hard only to go nowhere. Christian begs me to allow the doctor to order an epidural, finally I concede._

_ I grip his hand and lean forward into his body, sitting on the edge of my bed while the anesthesiologist makes quick work of administering the needle along with the pain medication. A whimper escapes my lips and sweat beads on my forehead. _

"_I'm right here Ana, look at me baby." Worry washes through Christian's voice showing his powerlessness and how feeble it causes him to feel. Keeping my eyes locked on his I grind my teeth, working through the needle as well as the pain from the contractions. _

_Finally after what feels like an eternity numbness begins to spread down the lower half of my body. "This will take the edge off of the contractions Mrs. Grey." I faintly hear the voice of the male doctor behind me mixed in with the beeps, and two familiar voices sounding just beyond the door to my room. "You can lie back now ma'am." He tells me and Christian along with Nurse Karen guides me back to lie down on my bed. _

"_Mrs. Grey, my shift is about to end. Nurse Lauren will be taking over my patients. I will bring her in to meet you."_

_Christian thanks Nurse Karen for everything she has done to help us before she leaves the room. When she leaves I hear her speak to someone at the doorway and look over to see my mom entering the room with Grace. _

"_Baby girl!" She exclaims rushing over to me and carefully wrapping me in a hug. Oh, Mommy! It's so good to have her here with me. Everyone is here now blip, you can come now, I tell my baby silently. _

"_Mom, I'm so glad you're here."_

"_I got here as soon as I could baby girl. I couldn't miss seeing my first grandchild enter this world. How are you feeling?"_

_I know she cares, they all do but I am getting tired of being asked how I feel. Geeze, what brought on that snappy mood? Oh yes, over eight hours of labor and very little sleep. I plaster on a smile and tell her that I'm doing fine. _

"_Did you let them give you anything for the pain Ana?" Grace asks with concern on her face. _

"_She just had an epidural." Christian interjects, bringing the hand he is holding to his lips he presses a warm kisses to each of my knuckles. _

"_Good, you should try to rest then." She turns her gaze to Christian and I know she wants to say something to him but is unsure of how to approach him. "Son, I know this is wearing. Would you like to take a break? Carla and I could sit with Ana." _

_My body tenses my eyes flicker to Christian in panic. No, please don't leave me. I can't do this without you Christian. I need you. _

"_I'm not leaving her side Mom." He says with determination. _

"_It is okay if you need a break Christian." My mom tries. _

"_No. Don't worry baby, I'm staying right here with you." He presses a hand to my belly, rubbing it, soothing me as I feel my muscles begin to tighten. The monitor shows that I am indeed having a contraction. The sharp pain is not there anymore but I still feel it, my grip on Christian's hand tightens. "Breathe Ana," he encourages me softly. Grace and my mom exchange worried glances but wisely choose to say nothing more. _

_**I have been in**__ labor for twelve hours. Dr. Greene checks me again and I have made no progress. Christian reaches over to my cheek and wipes a lone tear away with his thumb as it rolls down my face. This is so frustrating, why am I not moving forward? Why is blip not coming? Mom, Grace, Kate and Mia have been in and out of the room, all visiting for a few minutes each as the morning has worn on. I am tired, exhausted and I just want to sleep. The contractions are wearing on me because I know they are not helping me to progress. _

"_Mrs. Grey I would like to start a Pitocin drip, hopefully that will help you to dilate and move your labor along." Dr. Greene tells me. I agree, praying that this will be what I need to bring blip into the world quicker. _

_Nurse Lauren starts my Pitocin drip and offers me more ice chips which I gladly take. My mouth is so dry and I am hungry but not allowed to eat. Kate comes in offering to give Christian a break. He abruptly cuts her off, refusing to leave my side. I give Kate an apologetic look, she nods in understanding and tells me she will be back to check on me. I love my family and friend but this feels so personal, I only want to share this time with my husband. I work through contraction after contraction, they become stronger and more frequent due to the Pitocin and I am hopeful for progress._

_My hopes are dashed though when Dr. Greene checks me after two hours of Pitocin. "Mrs. Grey, I'd like for you consider a cesarean delivery." She says with a matter of fact tone._

"_No, please, I want to push my baby out." I beg her, looking between her and Christian. _

"_Ana,"_

"_Christian, no! Please I don't want that."_

"_Mrs. Grey, I'm willing to let you labor for a while longer but if I don't see any progress a cesarean may be the only option." Christian shoots Dr. Greene an icy glare and I wait for him to unleash on her. He does not approve of her letting me wait; he wants her to perform the cesarean now. My heart is in my throat though; this is not what I want. Unable to talk I sit dumbfounded while Dr. Greene checks my blood pressure, heart rate and temperature. She tells me I am running a slight fever, just over one hundred and blips heart right is marginally elevated. Attempting to process this information I feel my head swimming just as another contraction hits. _

"_Please Ana," Christian begs._

"_Let me try Christian, give me more time." I grit my teeth and a few tears fall. He holds my hand with his other arm behind me, rubbing the small of my back. _

"_Okay baby, okay…" He coos. Thankfully Dr. Greene leaves the room, allowing us to be alone again. Once the contraction passes Christian cups my face in his hands and kisses my lips adoringly. "Just think about it Ana." He whispers. Thank you for not arguing further with me Christian. _

"_I will," I nod and murmur back to him. I am tired, so tired. _

_ When Dr. Greene comes back to check my contractions have slowed to the point of almost being nonexistent. My cheeks are tear stained and I feel disheartened despite the reassuring words from my mom and Grace. Christian wears a look of exhaustion which matches my own. _

_-_Mrs. Grey, you've been in labor for fifteen hours now. Your contractions have slowed in spite of the Pitocin. We need to do a C-section-the baby is in distress." Dr. Greene is adamant.

"About fucking time!" Christian growls at her. Dr. Greene ignores him.

"Christian, quite." I squeeze his hand. My voice is low and weak and everything is fuzzy-the walls, the machines, the green-gowned people…I just want to go to sleep. But I have something important to do first…Oh yes. "I wanted to push him out myself."

"Mrs. Grey, please, C-section."

"Please, Ana," Christian pleads.

"Can I sleep then?"

"Yes, baby, yes." It's almost a sob, and Christian kisses my forehead.

"I want to see the Lil' Blip."

"You will."

"Okay," I whisper.

"Finally," Dr. Greene mutters, "Nurse page the anesthesiologist, Dr. Miller, prep for a C-section. Mrs. Grey we are going to move you to the OR."

"Move?" Christian and I speak at once.

"Yes. Now."

And suddenly we're moving-quickly, the lights on the ceiling blurring into one long bright strip as I'm whisked across the corridor.

"_Mr. Grey, you'll need to change into scrubs." I hear Dr. Greene's voice but her words fail to register. Ana, I need to be with my Ana. She is scared. What in the hell is that doctor droning on and on about._

"_What?" I growl back at her in agitation._

"_Now, Mr. Grey." Now what? Then it hits me and I squeeze Ana's hand tightly in mine before letting go. I hear her calling my name in panic as they wheel her further and further away from me. I stand momentarily frozen like a statue, my feet refusing to move me as I watch the team of nurses and doctors wheeling her down the hall. Mom, I need to see her. Finding my sense I dart back down the hall, slamming past anyone who gets in my way until I am in the waiting room. Mom and Dad both stand at once when they see me. I can see Ray and Carla jumping to their feet but Mom, she's all I see. _

"_They've taken her for a cesarean." My voice sounds distant and dull. I'm not even sure of the words which are coming from my mouth. _

"_Christian is she okay? Is the baby okay?" She grabs both of my arms in her hands, her eyes searching mine in fear._

"_I…I…I don't know. They said the baby is in distress and something about me putting on scrubs. I'm so scared Mom, I don't know."_

_I hear Carla cry out in shock but cannot turn my attention away from the woman standing in front of me. Guide me Mom; tell me what to do because without Ana I am lost. She takes my hand and begins pulling me. "Now Christian!" She shouts and I follow her without another word. _

_ I slip the blue shirt over my own and rush out from the small room to the OR where Ana is waiting for me. "Be strong for her Christian, she needs for you to be strong." My mother's words echo over and over again in my mind as I dash down the hall. This isn't about you Grey, this is about your wife and your baby. Be strong for Ana. _

_ When I open the doors the sounds and sights of what is happening hit me all at once. The room is crowded and moving with hurried activity. When my sights settle on Ana though it all dissipates and I focus on her. She is lying on the table with a screen across her chest, her face frozen with fright. She is alone and I have to get to her. I move past the nurses and doctors until I am beside her head. Her distressed blue eyes flick in my direction and she reaches to grab my hand. _

"_I'm frightened," she whispers hoarsely and I feel my chest crushing in on itself. I want to scream, curse, cry, take her and leave this place, never look back, but I can't. My only option is to get her through this. _

"_No, baby, no. I'm here. Don't be frightened. Not my strong Ana." I press my lips to her forehead. She begins questioning me about what's wrong. I'm scared out of my mind. If I lose her it will kill me. I will fucking die because a life without her isn't worth living. I can't let her know that though. I won't burden her with my fears. _

"_Nothing's wrong. Everything's fine. Baby, you're just exhausted." Please God, let me convince her not to worry about me. I never pray but in this moment I am praying so hard. Please God, don't take my wife away from me. Dr. Greene is saying something about adjusting her epidural and her having another contraction but that is all superfluous to me. Ana is squeezing my hand with the strength of ten fucking men, all the while her gaze is firmly locked onto mine. _

_Slowly her grip loosens and the doctor asks her if she can feel something. Ana answers back telling her 'no' and Dr. Greene gives Dr. Miller the go ahead to move forward with the procedure. _

"_I love you," she whispers to me. _

"_Oh Ana, I love you too, so much." My voice begins to quiver, a sob threatening to break through. Raising my head I risk a glance over the curtain. I am unable to move my eyes from the sight before me. Ana asks me what is happening but I can't speak as I watch the doctors remove a tiny, perfect, human being from my wife's body. Two small arms and two small legs, perfectly made begin to move around stiffly. His tiny eyes are wide open before his mouth is._

"_Suction! Good…" someone says, but it's a distant sound to the one which meets my ears next._

_That tiny baby boy, our blip, lets out a piercing cry, angry to have been removed from his mother's body, Ana's body. _

"_You have a boy, Mrs. Grey. Check his Apgar."_

"_Apgar is nine."_

_This medical jargon makes no sense to me and right now it doesn't matter._

"_Can I see him?" Ana gasps from beside me as the doctor holds the baby out to me, wrapped in a blue hospital blanket. For a brief moment I stand stark still._

"_Your son Mr. Grey." Dr. Greene says handing him to me. Awkwardly I take the bundle that is our blip into my arms. Supporting his head with my hand I observe his pink skin covered in white pulp and blood. For the third time in less than twenty four hours my chest feels like it will burst only this time it feels much heavier, this is so much more than anything I have ever felt. I move so I am back beside Ana and hold him down so that she can see him. My eyes are filled with tears, stinging as I hold them back, my stare has not wavered from the baby in my arms. _

"_Here's your son, Mrs. Grey." I whisper to her, my throat clenching around my words. _

"_Our son, he's beautiful." And for the first time since our blip arrived I look into her bright blue eyes, filled with love and wonder, all of the previous pain and fear forgotten._

"_He is." I agree and kiss his forehead. His eyes are tightly closed. Little Theodore Raymond Grey has fallen fast asleep in my arms. "Thank you, Ana." I say before leaning down to kiss her forehead this time._

_**Over an hour passes, **__dragging on like an eternity, as our baby is taken to the nursery and Ana is taken to recovery. _

"_Christian, please go tell our parents we are okay." Ana pleads with me as she lays in the recovery room. I don't want to leave her though, I already feel like a part of me is missing, not having our son with us. I can't be without Ana too, her body is trembling and it scares me. Dr. Greene insists she is recovering, that everything is quite normal and that she will be in her own room soon. _

_I squeeze her hand and bring it to my lips to kiss. "I don't want to leave you Ana."_

"_Just for a minute to tell them, please," she says again. I know both of our parents must be worried. _

_Finally I nod and agree to go, promising to be right back. _

_ Upon walking into the waiting room I see my mother with her head down, resting in her hands, Dad is rubbing her back. When she hears my footsteps against the hospital floor she looks up, her weary eyes widening. _

"_Christian!" She calls out my name and I hold out my arms just in time to catch her. _

_I brush her hair with my hand, "She's okay Mom, she and blip are both fine." I tell her smoothing her hair. Carla begins weeping silently and I see Ray pat her arm, both of them smiling broadly._

_I feel my Dad clap me on the back firmly, "Congratulations son."_

_I tell them that Ana is in recovery and that I will come get them once she is in her own room. After letting me go Mom wipes her eyes with her white linen handkerchief. "Good, I'm going to go call everyone and let them know. Christian, I'm so proud of you both."_

_For the fourth time today my chest tightens, it's so full it feels like it might explode. I shake the feeling and speak with Carla and Ray briefly before going back to Ana. _

_**Ana is resting quietly, **__a permanent smile painted across her beautiful lips, as she leans against the crisp white pillows which I have placed behind her head. I sit beside her, just watching her. She amazes me, this beautiful woman, my wife who created our beautiful baby with me. Whenever I don't think I could possibly love her anymore, I do. _

"_Happy?"_

"_So Happy." She gives me a tired smile, lifting the corners of her mouth just a slight bit more._

_A soft knock sounds at the door before opening. One of the nurses wheels in our son. He is lying in a clear plastic hospital bassinet, wrapped in a blue blanket with a tiny pink and blue stripped cap on his head. She pushes him over to me and I watch in wonder as he opens his deep blue eyes to look at me. _

"_Would you like to feed him Mrs. Grey?" The nurse asks and I see Ana's face light up even more. _

"_Yes, please."_

_I stand and move back to the head of Ana's bed. First the nurse adjusts a nursing pillow around Ana's waist. Ana listens intently while she explains how it may be more comfortable to use the pillow while feeding due to her incision. Then the nurse lifts Ted carefully and places him in his mother's arms, for the first time. Tears begin to fall from her eyes and I watch her attempt to dash them away quickly with one hand. With a calm patience the nurse instructs Ana on how to feed him and in no time he has latched and is nursing contentedly at Ana's breast. She watches him incredulously, almost unable to believe that he is here. _

"_Look Daddy, look how well he eats." _

_The nurse moves away quietly, leaving us, after telling Ana she will be back to check on them soon. It's as if Ana was meant to be a mother, my son's mother; from this very beginning she knows what he needs and how to care for him. I take my seat back at Ana's side and tentatively reach my hand to touch our son as he nurses. Instinctively he grabs my index finger, wrapping his tiny hand around it tightly. I want to say something to her but I can't, the words are lost. _

_Another knock sounds at the door and I look up to see our parents. They all stop, standing still. Ana looks up from our son and smiles at them. "Come and meet our son, Theodore Raymond Grey, Teddy for short."_

_They all move in unison until they are surrounding the bed. "He's beautiful baby girl." Carla says. Right behind her sentiment is Rays, "I'm so proud of you Annie." He tells her trying to choke back his tears. _

_Carla and Ray echo my emotions. He is beautiful and I am so proud of my wife. For as long as I live I will protect these two people. I bring my other arm up touch Ana's cheek. She turns her face towards mine._

"_I'm so proud of you Mommy." Leaning in I kiss her lips chastely._

"_I'm proud of you too Daddy." She whispers against my lips before letting her head fall against my shoulder, and we both sit like this. Gazing at our son, watching him as our family watches us. _


End file.
